The following is to be read in the narrator’s voice from one of those 1950’s educational films:
The Dutch are a proud, hard-working, and rather tall people. They’ve made many contributions to global culture, particularly in the arts, water management, seafaring, and the slave trade. The Netherlands is also well-known for the use of bicycles in their bustling cities rather than automobiles. The result of this two-wheeled transportation point of view is that the fine, fine ‘Nederlanders’ who do operate motor cars can’t park them worth shit.
Of course, the above is hyperbole and intended to induce a chuckle or two. But the fact remains that if there’s one skill the Dutch lack, it’s the ability to properly park an automobile. Continue reading
So Whitney Houston is dead.
My first reactions were pretty typical of me when it comes to celebrities running amok. I didn’t really care.
To me, it seems somewhat disingenuous to go on about how sad it is that this famous person died or suffered some other brand of misfortune. It also feels a little inappropriate to me when we pass judgement on the circumstances. While these people have indeed made the choice to live their lives in the public’s scope, we very rarely know who they really are. I support the idea that says people in the public eye (entertainers, politicians, and the like) should be subject to a certain amount of scrutiny. But there’s a limit to what we can see with the naked eye.
I do believe that Houston’s death, which we all pretty much presume was connected to her substance abuse issues, should be important though.
The reason being is that in America, all things related to drugs seem to be viewed through a rather strange lens, and that is perhaps highlighted by Houston’s struggles.
First, there’s the issue of illegal recreational drugs including, but not limited to marijuana, cocaine in its various forms, LSD, ecstasy, and heroin/opiates. Continue reading
One of the more popular videos making its way around the net right now is this one entitled Facebook Parenting: For the troubled teen.
Here it is:
Here we have a common species of super-suburban/rural American redneck who is angry with his teenaged daughter because she doesn’t much care for him and expressed this behind his back. More specifically, she did this on Facebook. We can presume that either she forgot to set the privacy level for her post to friends-only or her father used some manner of trickery to gain access, which seems most likely given he touts his occupation as, “working in IT.” He read the offending post after he’d spent time and money to upgrade her laptop computer. Feeling oh-so slighted, he makes a video of himself reading the Facebook post aloud, reprimands his daughter publicly and finishes things off by putting several .45 caliber “exploding hollow point rounds” through his daughter’s laptop computer, presumably the very device she used to make the post. That is to say he repeatedly shoots the fucking thing with a semi-automatic pistol.
He shoots… a goddamned laptop.
That said, I don’t expect you to read it.
But, I do fancy myself (desperately, *uNf*) to be something of a writer, so I guess I should fucking, write, huh?
I don’t really have a plan for this space as of yet, and I guess there’s some freedom in that. I’ve had lofty ideas of concept blogs and such in the past, but I never actually follow through. This is certainly the result of various character flaws, without doubt. But I think I’m less likely to simply abandon this if I’m not restricting myself to a certain format, topic, style, blah, blah-dee, blah, fucking-blah.
Anyway, if you ever have anything to say, please feel free to leave your comments. I won’t guarantee that I’ll reply or anything, but I’ll try.
Let me start by saying I’m a fan. I like Madonna. She’s without a doubt the most important female pop musician of the 80’s and is only bested perhaps by Michael Jackson. She’s arguably the most important woman ever in pop. These are things that just can’t be denied.
On a more personal note, Madonna kind of served as one of my first celebrity crushes (along with Annie Lennox). That is to say she helped shape my view of the world in a rather significant way. After all, my very first memory of seeing something sexy and understanding that it was indeed something arousing was her performance of “Like a Virgin” on MTV’s Video Music Awards in 1994. That was and has been a touch stone in my sexuality ever since.
And the music, while rarely mind-blowing, was at least throughout the 80’s and early 90’s acceptably dance-worthy, fun, and addictive. Not to mention that you never mistook her voice for someone else.
But now, after nearly 30 years of legitimate fame, Madonna is just terrible. Continue reading